polgara_5: (who me)
polgara-5 ([personal profile] polgara_5) wrote2008-10-31 10:57 am
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Fic: Plan 9 From Outer Space Rated: G 1/1

Title: Plan 9 From Outer Space
By: Polgara (melindoranightsilver@hotmail.com)
Rating: G
Fandoms: BtVS, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (book 3 of the Narnia series if you're looking at the original numbering, not sure where it falls now)
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the recognizable characters or places. They belong to their respective creators and distributors.
Setting: Post Chosen for Buffy, post Voyage for Narnia (specific mention of characters and situation from the book)
Summary: Dawn's close encounter is one that no one will believe.


A/N: Written for my ylist's Halloween B-Movie Challenge. Umm... this turned out nothing like a horror movie, even a bad one, but I saw the title and my muse decided this was the way to go and she refused to be deterred. I'm afraid this is more crack fic than anything else. You have been warned...



Plan 9 From Outer Space

Dawn frowned as she heard odd thumping coming from somewhere in front of her. Her body fell still as she tried to figure out the uneven sounds. Eyes fluttered shut as she concentrated on identifying them.

There was definitely more than one of them since it sounded like two whatevers hit the ground simultaneously. Judging from the varying intensities of them, there was the possibility of at least five somethings ahead. Excited voices came floating towards her.

“That's the way, chap. You know what you're doing, Chief, I say. Wouldn't you agree?”

“Oh, yes, he does. Good head on his shoulders our Chief,” another voice piped up.

Several other voices spoke up adding in their agreement.

A faint smile twitched at the corners of Dawn's mouth as she opened her eyes. Whoever was ahead seemed to be a friendly bunch. Or at least they currently weren't plotting the destruction of Earth or mankind.

Curiosity spurred her forward and as she crested the small hill her jaw dropped in surprise. The thumping noise was easily explained by the owners of the voices – beings with one leg and a very large foot shaped something like a surfboard at the end. As she looked closer she amended that thought as the leg was really just a thick extension from their body. Other than that they looked vaguely human, if a bit short.

They bounced around the field excitedly picking up something from the ground. Words of encouragement issuing from them every few seconds with two or three others immediately agreeing.

The thumping came to a stop as they caught sight of her and then several of them hopped over to her.

“Um, hi,” she said, unsure of their intentions and almost hoping that she had brought a slayer with her on her daily walk.

“Say, it's a girl,” one of them proclaimed loudly.

“That's our chief, can spot them a mile away he can,” the one next to him chimed in.

“He can!” Another one exclaimed.

“Is there anything I could help you with?” Dawn asked, trying to ignore the way they were stating the obvious.

“No need, we're just collecting specific flowers that should help lessen our ugliness,” the one she presumed to be the chief informed her. Several of the others added in their agreement.

“Ugliness?” Dawn asked in surprise. While the beings in front of her were never going to be classified as beautiful, they were quite cute.

The chief let out a huge sigh. “A rather long story to impart to such a young girl as yourself, but we were made ugly like this by a magician. At first we made ourselves invisible by a spell so we wouldn't have to see our uglified selves, but we grew bored. A young girl helped us remove the spell, but we have grown tired of seeing how ugly we are. Stories of beautiful flowers from your planet reached our ears and we set out to bring them back to help us with our problem.”

“Our chief came up with a plan to get us here!”

“He's an educated man!”

“This was his ninth plan!”

“The ninth one is always the best one.”

“That it is, I've always said so.”

Dawn gave up trying to keep track of what they were all trying to tell her and she held up her hands for silence. Once they settled she tried to sort everything out. “So you came to our planet to pick flowers and this is your ninth attempt.”

“She catches on fast, chief.”

Suddenly one called out, “It's mid-day!” The chief gave Dawn a polite nod and then promptly laid down on his back. His one leg stuck straight up in the air and his foot shielded his eyes from the sun. All around him the others followed his actions, and to Dawn's surprise, they promptly fell asleep.

“Rather adorable aren't they?” A man's voice coming from beside her made her jump from the shock.

“I guess so,” she said, eying the old man carefully.

“I'm Coriakin,” he said, introducing himself with a friendly smile. “I'm their caretaker, of sorts. They're frightfully stupid usually, but they will surprise you. They managed to sneak past me to find a spell in my book to bring us all here.”

“You're the magician that made them ugly?” Dawn asked, remembering that the creatures had mentioned magic earlier.

“I didn't exactly make them ugly, only they seem to think so,” he said with a small sigh.

She turned back to look at them. “I think they're rather cute.”

“Lucy had said so as well.”

“Lucy?”

“A young girl who reversed the invisibility spell. She helped name them the Dufflepuds. Mind you, she didn't choose the name, they just turned around something she had said.”

“Dufflepuds from outer space here to collect flowers on their ninth plan,” Dawn said, unsuccessfully trying to stifle her laughter. “Buffy will never believe this.”

~finis~

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